我无法告诉你我花了多少时间和学生们谈论他们的家庭. Although I specialize in 谈话s on faith, we do not often make it far before family of origin comes up. According to a 2017 study done by the Pew Research Center, 当被问及是什么给了他们意义感时，69%的美国人认为是家庭. 相比之下，只有20%的人认为灵性和信仰有同样的作用. In a generation that is becoming less and less religious at an alarming rate, with thirty-one percent of Generation-Z claiming no religious affiliation, 知道如何很好地吸引bwin体育的学生，满足他们的需求是很重要的. 这就是你的用武之地.
Family relationships may be the most challenging relationships we encounter, 但bwin体育从上面学到的是，无论bwin体育的家庭关系有多大的包袱, our students still crave connection with their family. 随着年龄的增长，如果说我学到了什么，那就是父母也渴望与孩子建立联系, 然而，他们可能没有准备好让他们的大学生在新的生活阶段中很好地融入他们的生活. 我希望在这篇简短的文章中，能给家长提供一些有用的工具，让他们知道如何与学生进行有目的的对话, to not only build your relationship, and to strengthen your and your student’s faith.
耶稣的脚一定很累，因为在他三年的事工中，他经常旅行. 这件事教会我的是，耶稣总是在人们所在的地方遇见他们. 可悲的是, bwin体育非常希望确保bwin体育的学生在bwin体育希望他们在的地方，或者在bwin体育希望他们在的地方，bwin体育给他们已经很沉重的肩膀施加了不必要的压力. While your student needs direction at times, usually they most long for a place to be seen and heard; a place to feel safe. 我无法告诉你我有多少次试图解决我学生的问题, 尽可能给他们最好的建议, but all they wanted was a listening ear; it really can be the best medicine.
耶稣不仅在人们在的地方与他们见面并认真倾听，他还提出了精彩的问题. 我可以想象我有多少次因为缺乏沟通而让我的父母沮丧, especially when they asked me questions. 我也知道，有时候bwin体育的问题很弱，不能打开学生最渴望的对话之门. “学校怎么样??,” is a question your student has perfected at answering. 他们用简短的回答, “好,也许是因为这个问题没有给他们足够的方向来深入地回答, but also because they may be answering the way they think you want. 这个问题只会让谈话中断，并可能在你和他们之间竖起一堵墙. 现在这需要你的努力了, but to engage your student more fruitfully, try thinking of a specific question that will require an in-depth answer, “你正在学习的关于上帝的什么东西最近给你带来了挑战?”, “what relationship do you have right now that brings you joy?”, “what has been an exhausting part of your last week?，“现在谁在投资你的生活，你从他们身上学到了什么??这些问题将为你打开更多对话的大门，并让你对你深爱的人的生活有宝贵的见解. Do not be surprised if these questions initially catch your student off-guard, 对他们来说，这可能是一种新的动态, 但是相信我, they are capable of answering the question, 所以给他们时间, 但不要停止发问. And remember, seek first to listen, and understand. If your student gives the green light to receive your input then give it, 但他们可能只是想谈谈. 甚至更好的, share your own answer to the question, 让你的学生看到你和他们在一起，并向他们表明你也愿意去那里. 如此简单的事情确实有力量戏剧性地改变你们的关系.
我最后的鼓励是关于越来越多的学生在进入大学后离开了他们的信仰. bwin体育的学生在bwin体育学习的每一个角落都能听到上帝的声音, but if a connection is not made outside of that time, 它不太可能坚持下去. As your student grows in their understanding of God and His character, they need multiple touch points to solidify those teachings. 生命之路研究小组的一项研究发现，当父母双方都积极参与教堂活动并定期参与基督教社区活动时, 他们的孩子中有72%在长大后会继续进行属灵操练. If the Father is the only one attending church, 55% will go on in their faith; if only the mother, 15%. 这些数字可能令人震惊，但也呼吁父母认真对待自己的信仰，以及这对孩子的影响. 我认识到，对于bwin体育大多数人来说，bwin体育都对如何追求与上帝的关系有疑问, 感觉就像未知的地形, and this causes us to potentially feel hopeless. Do not worry, it is not hopeless; start somewhere! My encouragement for a parent is to start with the Bible. Crack open the New Testament and start with the Gospel of John. 参与你自己的问题, 与你的孩子分享你正在学习的东西，并询问他们对这个话题的看法. 继续为你的学生祈祷，并检查你为他们祈祷的事情. If it sounds easy, that’s because it is.
I will close with a story from a recent meeting with a student. 他马上就要参加一场重要的比赛了，他非常想让他爸爸看到他比赛, he wrestled through questions of if his dad really wanted to support him, 还是说他是他的负担. With pure joy the student went on to share that his dad did in fact show up. The student chronicled introducing his dad to all his teammates, 和他一起度过一天, and the freedom he was able to run with because his dad was there. “All I crave is my father’s love, it makes everything else wash away.” Parents, it really can be as simple as showing up and being intentional. 谁知道这个简单的任务会如何改变你的学生甚至你的生活呢. 上帝保佑!
-John Wilhelm, Director of Campus Ministries
bwin体育博客中表达的观点是其作者的观点，并不一定代表bwin体育的观点或官方立场. bwin体育博客是教师和撰稿人表达观点的地方, 学术见解, and contribute to national 谈话s to spark thought, 谈话, 以及对真理的追求, in line with our philosophy as a Christian, 文科院校.
2023年2月28日
无论你是否已经经历过让孩子从大学毕业的旅程，还是这是第一次, it is important to remember that just like every child is different, every post-graduation path will also look different.
Regardless of where your student finds themselves in their academic journey, you might observe your student shifting towards independence, 尤其是每年的这个时候, 变得不那么依赖你.
临近毕业最令人生畏的一个方面是，在确定选择和了解所有选择时，要知道从哪里开始. 一个更容易被忽视的机会是一个以信仰为基础的项目，名为“研究员倡议”(TFI)。.
You may not be taking exams or finishing up final papers and projects, 但是你可以选择积极支持你的学生度过紧张的考试期.
思乡病是学生们共同的挣扎，通常会持续三周到一年多的时间. There are a few supportive steps parents, 监护人, and caretakers can engage in when their student is missing home.
Jubilee is a 3-day conference (February 16-18, 2024) for students who want their college experience to mean more. Jesus Christ changes everything, discover how at Jubilee!
Talking to your student about grades and academic success can be challenging! Read some tips from our Director of Student Success about these 谈话s.
请听bwin体育的电话主任 & 关于bwin体育bwin体育独特的建立学生发展关系的方法，以及如何影响bwin体育的学生.
父母经常听到他们的学生经历的挑战和消极, but getting the full picture can be difficult. bwin体育的住宿生活主任提供了一些有用的建议来进行有意义的对话.
